Clunker loveAugust 21, 2009Jon Brooks 1 Comment »
The Cash for Clunkers program is ending on Monday. Although a lot of people took advantage of the government subsidy to trade in their low gas-mileage car for a more fuel efficient one, many seem to have done so with a good dose of regret and a whole lot of anthropomorphizing. Here’s a guy, for instance, who writes as an intro to his YouTube video called “The End of the Muscle Car, Goodbye Old Friend“:
got a new CAR! but have to give up an old friend to do it, Obama offered me 4500.00 for it, i feel like a cheap prostitute cause i jumped at the money.
And here’s a guy who seems to be in charge of making sure traded-in clunkers will never put rubber to road again. He has documented dozens of such mercy killings and enjoys his job as the Dr. Kevorkian of polluting vehicles about as much as any pet owner who has to accompany his sick dog or cat on that final journey to the vet. “As much as I don’t like doing this, I gotta do it,” he laments before he administers a fatal dose to the engine of a Ford Explorer. “It’s fighting,” he says of a Cadillac Deville that refuses to seize up.
So here’s hoping all of your clunkers, no matter their gas mileage, rest in peace in that great big junkyard in the sky…
Of course, there’s always the exception to the rule. The owner of this 1994 Ford Ranger hoots and hollers gleefully during the “clunker-bombing” of his car.